Sunday, February 26, 2006

We Won't Stanford This

Headline: Stanford tree mascot fired for drinking at basketball game

The student wearing the costume of the legendary mascot was suspended from duty after UC Berkeley police observed her drinking from a flask during a Stanford-Cal basketball game last week, officials said today.

If a tree falls down drunk in a gym, does anybody care? What kind of a sap gets busted for being trunk in public?

I'll bet she resembled something more indigenous to the Petrified Forest once the cops came over. I can picture them now, "C'mon fellas, it's time to cut that one down!" I wonder if there were K-9s involved - you know where I'm going with that one, I hope.

Or was she simply asked to make like a tree and leave?

Who has a tree for a mascot anyway? Does it make it any easier to root for your home team that way or something? There's no telling with those Beserkeley people.

Apparently, she was just a flask in the pan who'll soon be replaced. There aren't enough hoops for her to jump through to get out of that one - she wood if she could - I'm sure.

She'll have to figure out how to branch out into other areas from now on if she expects to grow from this experience. Forest Service, maybe?


Blogger StringMan said...

Hey, you are really good at that! That's funny. Do you suppose she had to listen to the cops bark orders at her?

7:11 PM, February 26, 2006  
Blogger OnMyWatch said...

thanks, yes, I'm sure she was run through the mill over the whole thing.

11:35 PM, February 26, 2006  
Blogger JohnB said...

All that lumbering about...I guess it would affect the 'timber' of her voice.
As a side note, this all seems so ironic at UC Berkeley.

10:19 AM, February 27, 2006  
Blogger OnMyWatch said...

I thought they were famous for the dope-smoking, drinking, hippie shit.

10:20 AM, February 27, 2006  
Blogger JohnB said...

My point EXACTLY!

10:39 AM, February 27, 2006  
Blogger OnMyWatch said...

hey, wait a minute, that's my line.


10:49 AM, February 27, 2006  
Blogger ItsTJoint said...

When she got busted, did she yell, "Son of a Birch!"

2:19 PM, March 01, 2006  
Blogger Rocky said...

Haha, loved this story.
I heard she was so bombed she was carving initials on herself, and later let a bunch of kids tie a tire swing onto her arm.

7:42 PM, March 01, 2006  

Post a Comment

<< Home