Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Cub Your Appetite

Headline: Bear Eats Oatmeal in Woman's Kitchen
WEST VANCOUVER, British Columbia, Jun. 20, 2006 (AP)
It was a real-life version of Goldilocks and the Three Bears _ only in reverse _ when a woman came home to find a young bear eating oatmeal in her kitchen.
Now, please, bear with me on this one. This had to be a true kodiak moment for that woman.

First of all, how did it know how to boil water? I guess he just had to experiment and see whether it would be too hot or too cold or juuuuuust right.

Secondly, why are people making such a big deal out of this anyway? It's not like he demanded bacon and a cup of coffee as well. When your stomach growls it's only natural to eat, right?

The one thing I am curious about is do their stomachs actually growl? Wouldn't that be confusing back at the cave? Excuse me, did you say something? No, for the tenth time, NO!!

Maybe it sounds human, who knows. If not, can you imagine the fights at the fishing hole? "Shut up man, you'll scare all the fish away! ...Grrr!" Hopeless.

Either way, what the report didn't state is the fact that the bear left a few bucks - antlers and all - for the cost of breakfast and cleaned up the mess in the kitchen.

Far be it from him to have anyone accuse him of creating a grizzly scene.

3 Comments:

Blogger JohnB said...

Now, that's a good way to bear one's porridge...ursa majorly.

7:36 PM, June 20, 2006  
Blogger StringMan said...

Funny comments, as usual. You know, instant oatmeal is really becoming a menace. I could bearly contain my laughter.

8:19 PM, June 20, 2006  
Blogger OnMyWatch said...

John, you think he used the big dipper to eat with? at least he has manners. :)

Stringman: thanks!

4:13 AM, June 21, 2006  

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