Skin Can't Sir

Headline: Burned Man Says He Was Better Off Naked

FORT PIERCE, Fla. - Paul Kuschel would have been better off naked — like many of the folks at Sunnier Palms Nudist Park. Instead, he was wearing a pair of nylon shorts Sunday when a generator he was working on backfired and sprayed him with starter fluid, setting him ablaze.

Well, that would've really burned my ass, too! But I don't see how he figures he would've been better off naked?!

"Kuschel reported to his carpentry job Monday morning, even though he can't even swing a hammer because of his injuries."

Something tells me he won't be swinging anything anytime soon, but you have to hand it to the guy because I sure as hell wouldn't have gone to work after experiencing a personal cookout, so to speak. Nope, I would've sizzled into a big tub of ice instead.

When in shock it's hard to tell what's happening, but I guess the first indication of serious trouble would've been the point when all the small children - straightened, wire coathangers in hand - ran toward him at top speed.

Kumba-Frickin-Ya, my Lord!

Guess the lesson to be learned here is, if you live in a nudist colony called Sunnier Palms then be prepared to get burned - one way or another.