Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Aching Joints

Headline: Denver Residents Legalize Marijuana Possession

DENVER — Residents of the Mile High City have voted to allow adults to possess up to an ounce of marijuana. Authorities, though, said state possession laws will be applied instead.

I guess they don't call it the Mile High City for nothing.

Just can't picture skiing while stoned. I had a hard enough time skiing when I was sober, much less in that condition.

Picture it: I'm standing on the landing waiting for the ski lift to come around and pick me up. I sit on the bench and get swooped off. Holding the poles between my feet, the little circles on the end caught onto the wooden platform. Did I let go of the poles? HELL NO!! Who would do that? Certainly I couldn't ski without poles!? I held on and I proceeded to do my first world-class ski jump right off of the lift - flipped head over skis and landed in the snow as if I were a 2-ton pallet dropped from a C-130 at 40,000 feet. Poof! The whole ski lift had to stop while the ski patrol guys recovered me. Oh, I was very popular for the rest of the day with the other patrons of the resort - yeah.

Maybe sliding down a mountain at a high rate of speed wouldn't bother me as much if were stoned. That could be the attraction. I can hear my friends now, "SNOW PLOW! SNOW PLOOOOW!!! ... Duuuuude."

Nope, I'm thinking hot chocolate in front of the fireplace in the lodge - it's all me.


2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

dude you suck. no one is responsible for your safety. if you want to get stoned and ski, that is your problem. You're going to be a better skiier simply because you aren't being a conservative self loving fuck and actually enjoy yourself for once.

3:21 PM, November 02, 2005  
Blogger OnMyWatch said...

I think you missed the point.

3:24 PM, November 02, 2005  

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