Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Aching Joints

Headline: Denver Residents Legalize Marijuana Possession

DENVER — Residents of the Mile High City have voted to allow adults to possess up to an ounce of marijuana. Authorities, though, said state possession laws will be applied instead.

I guess they don't call it the Mile High City for nothing.

Just can't picture skiing while stoned. I had a hard enough time skiing when I was sober, much less in that condition.

Picture it: I'm standing on the landing waiting for the ski lift to come around and pick me up. I sit on the bench and get swooped off. Holding the poles between my feet, the little circles on the end caught onto the wooden platform. Did I let go of the poles? HELL NO!! Who would do that? Certainly I couldn't ski without poles!? I held on and I proceeded to do my first world-class ski jump right off of the lift - flipped head over skis and landed in the snow as if I were a 2-ton pallet dropped from a C-130 at 40,000 feet. Poof! The whole ski lift had to stop while the ski patrol guys recovered me. Oh, I was very popular for the rest of the day with the other patrons of the resort - yeah.

Maybe sliding down a mountain at a high rate of speed wouldn't bother me as much if were stoned. That could be the attraction. I can hear my friends now, "SNOW PLOW! SNOW PLOOOOW!!! ... Duuuuude."

Nope, I'm thinking hot chocolate in front of the fireplace in the lodge - it's all me.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

dude you suck. no one is responsible for your safety. if you want to get stoned and ski, that is your problem. You're going to be a better skiier simply because you aren't being a conservative self loving fuck and actually enjoy yourself for once.

3:21 PM, November 02, 2005  
Blogger OnMyWatch said...

I think you missed the point.

3:24 PM, November 02, 2005  

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